A Woman Scorned

photo courtesy redbubble.net

photo courtesy redbubble.net

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned…

It’s a popular (maybe even cliched) saying, but it is steeped in truth. The real quote is actually by William Congreve – who was an English playwright and poet and was probably on the receiving end of a scorned woman’s fury – and it is:

“Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, nor hell a fury like a woman scorned.”

I would never have put myself down as a woman that has ever been scorned and to be honest, it’s not something I like to admit. But searching carefully through my mind, I have to own up and say that I have felt like a woman scorned once or twice in my life (actually twice).

The first time was at University and it was with a guy I thought I loved. I knew he loved me back and yet he chose someone else for reasons best known to him. Oh, I felt scorned. I did not go after him with a bazooka, but I completely amputated him from my life. I treated him like the scourge I decided he was and exterminated any form of relationship we could have had. And that’s the painful thing about being scorned…you never forget because even now as I’m writing this, when I know I don’t even care, I still will not have anything to do with him – not even as a friend.

The second instance of my feeling scorned happened quite recently and surprisingly, it was with a girl, Continue reading →

Making the Transition to Natural Hair

So I began a transition to natural hair. For the last 17 years my hair has been processed. I’ve had it cut short a few times but then as soon as it was long enough for relaxer, I slathered it on. This was mostly because my natural hair is so kinky and the curls so tiny and tight that I had no idea what to do with it.

There’s been a slow natural hair revolution in Nigeria and it’s gradually gaining momentum; all of a sudden, it’s more trendy to have natural hair on. This has been so for the last one or two years. So why am I just making the decision? Actually I’d thought about it… I have been thinking about it for some time. But I wanted to be sure I was not joining some band wagon, going natural simply because it seems trendy at the moment.

I still can’t say that I’m not being influenced somewhat, but at least I do know that I really want to do this. Continue reading →

When there’s no one to talk to


I am a writer and I write for a living. I am a ghostwriter and I get paid by people to write. And that’s all well and good, but what do I do when I can’t write? It’s not like I’ve lost the ability to write, this post is evidence of that. It’s just that each word is like water from a stone. I guess I’m suffering from writer’s block and I know why.

There has been a lot on my mind lately. I can’t stop thinking (and yes, I admit it, worrying). It’s sad when you have no one to talk to; to really share your heart with. Someone who won’t judge you or get impatient with you; who will see where you’re coming from and gently steer you in the right direction.

Writing that down, I guess maybe I’m asking for the impossible. People are not really like that? Or are they? I don’t know anymore. Continue reading →